Jencyclopedia

Mr. Furley wants to be a detective.
A man wants his family to respect him.

Ahh, what did Mrs. Pembroke do to her hair?

This lady is bringing a bird to the island? As if there aren’t enough birds here already?

So Aki is a recurring character I guess, because she has been referred to by name twice now.

So Furley’s at the bar, talking about his fantasy with Roarke. Roarke leaves, and suddenly there’s a guy harassing a woman. Furley realizes this is his fantasy, and he needs to get involved, but it woulda been funny if it turned out they had nothing to do with his fantasy and Furley was standing up to this tough guy for no reason.

Aaahaaaa omg he’s doing a film noir voiceover. This is amazing. Later season Fantasy Island was never that clever.

Stanley Scheckter: I like your taste in houses. I like your taste in stepdaughters too.

Eww.

For the past few episodes, they keep showing a lighthouse that’s red and white striped, but it’s missing a red stripe at the top, and it bugs me every time I see it.

[Tattoo passes on complaints from an unsatisfied guest to Roarke.]
Roarke: Too much attention to picky little details, Tattoo, is the mark of a small man.
Tattoo: …but I am a small man!

Iris Chandler: My husband is dead from the waist down. Arthur Hemmings is a man–a whole man.

Eww.

Roarke: The situation you’re involved in has gone beyond the point I first, uh, anticipated–beyond the point where I can control your safety. Rest assured, we are prepared to refund the price of your fantasy, in full, of course.
Stanley Scheckter: It’s really that dangerous?
Tattoo: If I’m gonna give back money, it’s got to be dangerous.
Stanley Scheckter: But this is my big case, the one I’ve dreamed about all my life!
Roarke: Mr. Scheckter, it could very well be the case that ends your life.

You don’t usually get lines like this from Roarke in the middle of an episode; usually that would be part of the opening spiel.

Ohhmygod, that’s a Fantasy Island cake! On my birthday, I googled “fantasy island cake” to see if anyone else had ever thought of such a thing, and there was just this one cake, which at first I was like oh, cool, it’s got a yellow and white plane, except the plane had crashed, which… is not very Fantasy Island. And there was a sign that said “The Boardwalk”, which there are a ton of named places on Fantasy Island, but I don’t ever recall hearing about no boardwalk. Anyway, I thought the closest I could get to a Fantasy Island cake would be a regular cake with the red calla lillies or whatever those flowers are, and that’s exactly what this cake had.

What the hell is this fantasy? This is like “Son of a Gypsy” if they kept spiking Mme. Rantha’s drink, and then there’s a dog for some reason, and then people on horses yelling “tally ho”. Like… what.

Wow, that’s a great moral; he finally gets respect from his family by yelling at them.

Roarke: You see, Tattoo, being the owner of Fantasy Island means never having to say you’re sorry.

Um. This seems like a Love Story reference, but I don’t really get the point of it. It’s like if Roarke was just randomly like “no one puts Tattoo in a corner” when Tattoo wasn’t even in a corner.