Things that don’t exist on the internet

  • A commercial for a Barbie computer game that for whatever reason has stuck with me all these years.

    Generation Girls: Gotta Groove! Pick a Gen Girl.
    “Tori!”
    “Nichelle!”

    Pick the moves, make her dance.
    “One, two!”
    Control the action, create the fashions, design cool sets.
    “Hee hee hee hee!”
    Spin, dip, twirl, flip, it’s amazing to see: the Generation Girls in 3-D!
    Generationgirldollssoldseparatelycomputernotincluded.

  • An episode of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire where, when it came to the part of the show where Regis was supposed to make small talk with the contestant, the contestant claimed to have exceptionally nice feet. Regis said something like, “well, I have really nice feet.” So Regis and the contestant proceeded to take off their socks and put a bare foot up in the air. They showed a split screen view of the guy’s feet vs. Regis’ feet, and they did an Ask the Audience and had the audience vote on who had better feet. Regis won (but he didn’t really have nicer feet).

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Why It Takes Two (1995) is better than The Parent Trap (1998)

I loved both of these movies when I was a kid, but It Takes Two is simply the better movie. They’re both based on The Parent Trap (1961), which I have never seen, but I’ve read the Wikipedia article, so I’m pretty much an expert.

Believability

The main reason It Takes Two is better is because It Takes Two is The Parent Trap with all the ridiculous parts taken out. You’re seriously telling me that a couple gets a divorce, they each take one of the twins, and never see the other kid again?

You’re telling me that a girl who lives in London (England) and a girl who lives in California (USA) both go to the same summer camp… in Maine?! (You’re telling me people go to Maine? (No offense, Maine. I don’t know anything about Maine, so I figure no one else does either.))

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